I think the best way to summarize my feelings about Redemption Cemetery: Bitter Frost is to say I’m deeply befuddled. I am a HUGE Redemption Cemetery fan; I love the clearly sectioned play areas (portals) and am delighted by the creepy, ghostly vibe that typically goes hand-in-hand with any Redemption Ceremony game.

But this time? Oh, this time.

What were you thinking, game developers? Beyond the portal-segmented game play, Redemption Cemetery: Bitter Frost was so far apart from all the other Redemption Cemetery games I just don’t know why they gave it the title.

Right from the very beginning, I found the game jarring and off-putting. What the heck kind of family tree is that? My older sister and mother are currently OBSESSED with our family tree, and I’m telling you - that ain’t one (I don’t care if it supposedly has magical powers, it’s wrong).

And oh my god, the plotline. I have no idea why a developer would think, “Hmm, what should we do to get into the Christmas market this year? I’ve got it! Mystical Native Americans, it’s just the thing.” I’ve never felt so off-balance from a storyline before.

One minute I’m chasing my Owl Spirit ancestor through a magic time-portal, and the next I’m freaking out about how Christmas-y/non-Christmas-y the place through the portal is. Who CARES? By this point, we’ve already figured out we were LITERALLY two seconds away from being ERASED FROM TIME. Maybe you want to give the Christmas thing a break and focus on your one remaining ancestor for just a minute!

And speaking of your last remaining ancestor! Talk about a convoluted backstory. Dude is supposed to be the immortal Owl Spirit, but he sacrificed his immortality to be with his One True Love, Sheenah (your ancestor).

Let’s pause at Sheenah for a moment, because I just need to say: holy cow, talk about a Disney’s Pocahontas rip-off. Not just a little bit - a lot. I kept expecting to stumble into a scene where I collected different objects to the tune of Colors of the Wind.

Hidden pine trails of the forest? Check.

Sun sweet berries of the earth? Check.

Copyright infringement? Double check.

Back to the Owl Dude: So this immortal guy gave up his immortality to marry Sheenah and become your ancestor. Seems fair. But it turns out there was an immortal snow spirit who was in love with him, so when he chose Sheenah over her, she apparently lost her mind a little bit and decided to dedicate her immortal life to eradicating Sheenah and all your other ancestors. Makes sense (it really doesn’t).

So now Owl Spirit has traveled through time (how?) to stop time (How?) to save you, because he was somehow aware that the still-immortal snow spirit wanted to wipe his entire line out.

HOW? He gave up his immortality, how did he know she was up to no good for HUNDREDS OF YEARS? I give him maybe forty years after he hit maturity till he’s dead. So how did he know the angry spirit lady was still mad? And how can he travel through time? What’s the point of setting up this major immortality sacrifice if he’s still functionally immortal?

WHY?

I’m not trying to say Redemption Cemetery: Bitter Frost was all bad. Although I was aggravated the developer decided to go for the Christmas/Native American thing and then didn’t follow through with any consistency (Are you trying to tell me there are no ACTUAL Native American voice actors? None?) I was ok with most of the voice acting, and I actually loved the evil snow spirit (Even though she didn’t sound even the slightest bit Native American. But, you know, details.)

I also enjoyed the look of Redemption Cemetery: Bitter Frost, even if I was bitterly (see what I did there?) disappointed in the sheer loveliness of the holiday season. This is Redemption Cemetery, not Winter Wonderland, and the occasional nod to the creepy was just silly when paired with all the Christmas trees and such.
Winter Wonderland

The Hidden Object Areas were cute, but nothing to write home about, and I was actually annoyed by the little puzzles you had to solve after each area was complete. Of all the mini-games out there, puzzle pieces annoy me the most. If I wanted to do an actual puzzle, I’d go buy one.

I did enjoy most of the mini-games, which were nicely varied and often times awfully cute. That’s right, this is a Redemption Cemetery game with CUTE MINI-GAMES. In the one below, you have to lead a puppy through a maze using dog treats. Adorable, but it doesn’t belong in Redemption Cemetery.

The whole thing just made me want to rant. Anytime my husband came within fifteen feet of the computer I was playing on I would start monologing about everything that was annoying me - there’s Christmas all over the place, these voice actors are all wrong, the volume keeps changing during big chunks of dialogue, those birds are so cute but WHY ARE THEY CUTE??

And so on. If you’ve been having a tough new year and just want to get mad at something and shout for a while without having to worry about a guilt trip later on for taking your feelings out on the cat (who probably didn’t mean to make your leg fall asleep, it’s just what happens when a cat is on your lap for that long) then I definitely suggest Redemption Cemetery: Bitter Frost. No hard feelings or impending cat retaliation necessary.

But if you’re looking for an interesting, worthy addition to the Redemption Cemetery brand that leaves you chilled and jumping at shadows? Skip it. You’ll save yourself one heck of a headache.